Current mood:	crushed
Current music:	"a voice within"- christina aguilera

i love her.....STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm cold.
you're a stupid fat fucker.
i hate you.
i definatly hate her.
i hate being in love with her.
i hate me.
i hate girls.
i dont like eating.
i hate that people like eating.
i am tired.
i hate being tired.
i think sleeping is at stupid waste of time.
strummin' MY pain with his finger.
you're face is dumb.
being gay is dumb.
i hate it.
i still hate you.
you should go away and leave me alone.
i'm cold.
i hate being cold.
i hate being overheated even more.
i hate pharmacology.
i hate wasting my time.
i like my new cell phone though.
but i hate it that you dont call me.
i hate going to the gym with you.
i love going to the gym with you though.
i hate being fat.
i hate not losing weight when i want to.
i hate that i want to lose weight.
i hate that everyone knows so much about me.
i hate that no one understands me none the less.
i hate that my throat hurts.
i do not like being sick.
i think being sick is a waste of my time.
i hate money.
i like to shop though.
i think bills are a big waste of my time.
i like school though.
school is expensive and usm will rape you of everything you're made up and then still jump you in the back alley when you least expect you and then spit on you when you have nothing left...not even a crumb.
sometimes i feel like dieing.
sometimes i feel like living.
sometimes i dont want to wake up, but then that may be cause i dont sleep well.
you're still a stupid fucker.
i hate that calcutta is such a sad desolate place.
i hate child prostitution.
i think sexual violence is fucked up.
i think men and women who sexually abuse kids should go away forever.
i think people who rape for any reason should go away.
i hate therapy.
i hate that bonnie told my micro class that i had a therapist.
but then she didn't, she just said it outloud.
people still heard and i hate that.
i hate borrowing her deoderant and smelling her all day long after.
no i really like it.
no i really hate it.
i do hate that i cannot figure this whole thing out.
i hate that my mom told me that i love her.
i hate that i wont admit it.
i hate that i do admit it.
i hate that i cant have her in my life.
and i hate the same that i cant get her out of my life.
i hate that i think about her. i hate it when i dont.
i am sick when i look upon her.
i am sick when i look not upon her.
i hate that i have to sit here and ramble on about it.
i hate that i like it.
i hate that this makes me feel better.
i hate that in two minutes when i stop i wont feel any better.
i like christina aguilera.
yeah i like her.
i hate that she told me that christina aguilera got married.
i hate it that i got too drunk.
i hate it that i kissed.
i hate it that she kissed me back.
no i liked that.
i did hate it when she pulled away and said she couldn't.
i hated it that she had a girlfriend.
i hate it now that she does not.
i like it no that she does not have a girlfriend.
i hate it that it was not me.
i hate that it is not me.
i am glad that it is not me.
i would like it if it was.
yeah i would like that very much.
i hate that all i want to do more then anything in the world is reach over and take her in my arms and kiss her lips until i can taste her spirit and i want to be so close to feel her heart beating at the very same moment as mine and be able to hold that moment forever and always be able to look back and remember how i felt at that very moment and what it felt like to feel it at that very same moment.
i hate ending....